Baseball has been berry berry good to me and I am sorry.  That’s my best Sammy Sosa impression.  I was pissed during my last post, but then my brother sent me a funny video from a prank war the guys at college humor are doing and that lifted my spirits, as I’m sure it will lift yours.  Take them in order as it is funnier that way.  http://www.collegehumor.com/tag:prank-war

Top of the 9th and the Cards are down 7-2 to the fucking Reds???  Are you kidding me?  That is rigoddamndiculous!!!  I say fuck the Cards and let Tony LaRussa walk away, who gives 2 shits.  I’ll take the secret weapon as my skipper any day of the week.  TLR (for those in the know) is responsible for the deaths of Daryl Kile, Josh Hancock, and if I tried to look hard enough probably Jesus Christ himself.  I blame LaRussa, Duncan & Jocketty for having the worst starting pitching ever.  Kip fucking Wells???  There’s a reason the Pirates didn’t want him back.  We have to stop thinking we can take pitchers off the shit heap and turn them into Kent Bottenfield (whose christian music cd drops next week) http://www.amazon.com/Back-Game-Kent-Bottenfield/dp/B000VAVHAG/ref=sr_1_2/105-6412930-9217206?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1189561838&sr=8-2  At least Milwaukee won tonight as I would rather see them win this shitty division. 

Thank god I didn’t drop $280 on the NFL package this year to watch the overated Bulger and the shitty Rams play this year.  Why can’t we get decent play calling?  Why is it an issue every fucking year.  Up here with the Bears, you never hear about bad play calling (except in the Dick Jauron era). 

Fuck the Blues, they don’t even exist to me along with the rest of the NHL.  What’s that you say, they signed Paul Kariya and got Keith Tkachuk back!!!  Awesome!!!!!!!  If it was fucking 1997 instead of 2007.

So I guess I will follow the Bears, Brewers and that soccer team that got that guy from Europe who can curve the ball.  I hear he’s really good and so is their team.

 Oh yeah, my wife (Mrs. TSR), picked up some honey roasted turkey from Meijer’s this week and it’s pretty good.

Well, since football season starts tonight and most of you dorks are debating whether a Reggie Bush or Deuce McAllister will get more chances for TD’s this year, I’ve decided to go in the wayback machine to list my fantasy little league soccer team.  Plus, if you are readers of another turkey sandwich blog site, you know we’ve been promised our team list days ago so we can decide who to play, but nothing is up yet.

Striker-Brian Gillick-always had a nose for the net.

Left wing-Todd Rick-small but quick and great ball handling skills.

Right wing-Surprisingly enough, I would bring a Chris Growe up here to give us size and since he’s slower than molasses, he can concentrate on crossing the ball.

center midfielder-Tim Leonard-the field general and he can control the game.

right midfield-Doug Banstetter can push the ball up when needed and is an asset on defense.

left midfield-Dave Markowitz-feisty

left defense-believe it or not, I have to go with a Chris Pleimann on this one as he can shut down a whole side of the field with his unusual style of play.

Stopper-Ty Stehr-you put him on the opponents best player and he will shut them down.

right defense-Don Jarvis, big leg, big body, big heart.

Sweeper-I’ll go with myself on this one, as I think Iled the d as well as anyone I saw.  I was also a threat to score when coming up on corner kicks.

Goalie-John Gilson, who else would you rather have in a shootout of the St. George tournament going up against the powerhouse St. Justin’s?  Great goalie, with good soft hands and excellent instinct.

Medic-since we all grew up to be drunks and out of shape, we would need a Nick Farrell tending the ambulance.

Welcome to the real turkey sandwich report.  This is often imitated, never duplicated.  I vow to not go longer than 3 days without talking to my fans, unlike those other turkey sandwich blogs.  If you are fed up (no pun intended) with those other sub (pun intended) par sandwich blogs, than post here!  By the way, my wife made me a great sub with Volpi salami, honey rosted turkey, all the fixings with some submarine sauce to give it that extra tang.